Creative Puns For Smart Minds

Chemistry Cat
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This was shared with me by a relative, some time ago and I thought it was too funny to not share. Enjoy…

  • The roundest knight at King Arthur’s Round Table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
  • I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.
  • She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.
  • A rubber band pistol was confiscated in an algebra class, because it was a weapon of math disruption.
  • The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
  • No matter how much you push the envelope, itll still be stationery.
  • A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.
  • A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.
  • Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
  • Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
  • A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
  • Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
  • Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other, You stay here, I’ll go on a head.
  • I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
  • A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said, Keep off the Grass.
  • A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, No change yet.
  • A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
  • The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
  • The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
  • A backward poet writes inverse.
  • In a democracy, its your vote that counts. In feudalism, its your count that votes.
  • When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.
  • Don’t join dangerous cults, practice safe sects!

The Internet Marketer’s Nightmare

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Internet Marketer’s Nightmare
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  • The source of the Internet Marketer’s persuasive power
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Internet Marketers use their devious tactics to push products on innocent victims every day that promise the moon and stars but never deliver more than a dark and silent night. They use every trick in the book and they charge you premium prices while they’re at it. In the hands of an experienced Internet Marketer, what I’m about to show you could easily be sold for $79, $89 even as much as $99! The fact is the information I am going to share with you is so valuable, that most Internet Marketer’s wouldn’t dare sell it! It is so powerful that it will change the industry forever!

Given all the value I am presenting here, all you have to gain, and all the money you will save by reading this ground-breaking book, you would expect to pay a very high premium for this information. However, because I have been so truly blessed with good fortune and because I want to reach as many people as possible, as quickly as possible, I am going to practically give my book away for the insanely low price of $1 $0!

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Columbo Nominee

In recognition of this eBook’s awesome power and enlightenment, this post has been nominated for and is a Top 10 finalist in The Columbo Award. Don’t forget to cast your vote for this post before the end of 2007!